Alright, I have had a few inquiries about Matt’s comment on the teacup pigs, so I figured I should lay it all out there. Let me tell you a little story about teacup pigs…
I have always been enamored with the idea of owning a pig. Well, not always. First I wanted to be a primatologist and own cages full of monkeys and apes. But then I found out they are dirty… so my affection moved to pigs. (Did I really just say that?) Pot belly pigs really tickled my fancy, but then they came up with teacup pigs, i.e. the cutest little creatures in the world. They are teeny tiny and ohsocute. Let’s get on with this ridiculous story though.
Flash back to Monday. There was a lull between patients, and we were all talking about pets. I said that once Chloe the Wonder Bulldog dies, we will probably take a break from canines. And then I threw in my fascination with teacup pigs. Now, I live in North Carolina where barbecue is king… and in Johnston County, the agriculture capital of practically the whole world. Pigs = something good to eat with slaw and hushpuppies, so the girls I work with were flabbergasted to hear about such a useless swine. They wanted to see pictures, so I turned to google. We oohed and ahhed over the sweet little piggies, and then it happened.
All these popups began coming up on my screen saying horrendous things like “You have a million terrible viruses on your computer. You are sending spam to thousands of people. The government will catch you for this. Now please pay $60 to get rid of this problem.” Thankfully, I am not a complete idiot, and I recognized that this was a virus and a scheme to get our credit card info. However, I also was totally freaking out that I had infected my work computer with a virus. Oh wait, let me rephrase that… the teacup pigs infected the server with the virus. As in no one at the office would be able to work from the computers the following day, creating mass pandemonium.
I brought my computer home to Matt, hoping that he could fix it. As I was sobbing, he turned to me and asked, “Catherine, have you ever been in trouble?” I nodded and said, “Yes, when I forged my mom’s signature on that math test when I was in third grade. And then on my 18th birthday.” He laughed. I cried more.
When I found out that he would need to do everything on location at my office, I decided that the time had come to break the news to my boss. I called her cell and immediately began to cry. I told her about the teacup pigs and kept blabbing and crying. Once I finally stopped to breathe, she started to laugh and said “Catherine. Calm down! It’s fine! And really… teacup pigs?” Then I cried more and went on about how I thought she was going to fire me and that we would be destitute without my income and that it had just been such a bad day. By then, she probably wanted to fire me, thinking that she had been employing a complete lunatic this whole time. But she reassured me and I felt much better.
To make an already long story shorter, we headed back to the office that night, and Matt got to work. He was able to fix the computers, and I felt like I could breathe again.
The moral of the story:
Teacup pigs are still really cute, but save your googling for home.